Stuck in a Turbulent Concorde

This title is not just a smart ploy to get you to open this link and read. It’s a sentiment I’ve been feeling since I joined my MBA six months ago. Late nights, stress, lectures, stress, fun parties, stress, you get the gist. It’s like a cornucopia of drama, action, envy and good old romance. It makes you feel like you’ve aged a couple of years in a couple of days at the same time some days seem like they are stuck in time loop. I’ve experienced a spectrum of emotions so large, that I’m surprised at my ability to feel so much. So yes, it is like being on the fastest journey through stormy skies.

I’m now one third an MBA, you can say I’m an M (terrible joke, I know) and I believe I’ve been propelled into something that I have no control over, but is giving me some clarity on what life ahead could be. So all the years of confusion, feeling lost yada yada seem to be slowly dissipating.

Why am I writing now, after all this time??

Well, it’s partly because I feel terrible that I’ve stopped blogging and also because I feel I need to take some time to process my MBA life. The speed and all is great, I’m adjusting; but there’s no time to really take it all in you see. I feel like I’m going through the motions, doing what everybody is doing, but not really retaining anything. So if you ask me two years later how my MBA was, the only thing I’d be able to say is that it was a blur. I absolutely can not let that be the case-you know how fond I am of long-winded descriptions and explanations that not just help with increasing the word count, but also help me re-live certain moments as I write them.

For example, I don’t want to forget the days I have woken up at 9:54 am for a 10 o’clock class, squeezed toothpaste into my mouth, picked my bag and run at break-neck speed to reach the class at 9:59:30 to swipe my attendance. Disgusting I know :’)

I don’t want to forget the time I experienced the power of a simple rumour, and believed that I had topped the class. Feelings of disbelief and dumb luck notwithstanding, the entire class thought of me as an operationally endowed person. Of course when I went to check my paper, the truth came out, the universe and its planets had realigned itself and I was back to being just another average girl :D. I’d like to thank the person who started the rumour for adding drama into my otherwise undramatic existence.

I don’t want to forget the wonderful hostel block parties that our seniors throw for us, with the drinks, music and conversations freely flowing. I’ve also learned how pretending to be drunker than you really are can let you get away with speaking your mind and result in some interesting chit chat. A room full of drunk people can also be an ideal place to study human behaviour when people lose their inhibitions and are the least bit bothered with keeping up appearances.

I don't want to forget this crazy bunch of humans I call friends, the weird conversations we have just at 3:00 am in the morning, the late night canteen trips for a piping hot cup of horlicks, the pulling each others' legs, tagging each other in stupid memes and our special table in the mess that has been privy to some of our weirdest lunch-time conversations. I don't want to forget the awesome Mysore trip, neither do I want to forget our ability to make each other laugh while irritating the hell out of each other.

I don’t want to forget the gruelling placement process that we went through, or scratch that-I’d rather forget the ordeal, but remember how a bunch of 400 people were there for each with a pep talk, or a shoulder, with interview prep tips or with a simple, reassuring hug. The best traits of human beings make themselves evident during periods of duress. It makes me appreciate the fact that I’ve met so many great people at this place.

I don’t want to forget the project groups, brainstorming sessions, the occasional desire to tear your hair out and the eventual sigh of relief once the submission is done, at 11:59:59 pm

I also don’t want to forget how I’ve been lucky to pursue the things I love ( basically everything except studying), have miraculously lost my fear of singing in public, and am still given the opportunity to prattle away on the microphone as a poor unsuspecting audience is forced to listen.

I find myself living a new experience with each passing day, hating it at times, but loving it in retrospect. MBA is a course that thrives on the Indian student’s slight tendency for masochism, desire to stay number one, and people-pleasing habits. People tell me it's changed me slightly, they can’t pinpoint what exactly has changed, but I guess it’s enhanced my ability to stay cool in the face of adversity. It has taught me to take the metaphorical chill pill once in a while. It has also helped me develop discerning tastes; for example-hot brownie fudge is a big yes, while paan mojito is a definite no no ;)

Summing up,

Am I glad that I’m here? Definitely.

Are there times when I feel like running away? Of course.

But given the chance will I do it all over again?? Undoubtedly yes.